We have been home for almost 2 weeks now and are certainly beginning to settle in to our new norm as a family of 5. That first week was a doozy! I was so not prepared for the jet lag....it is no joke! And having jet lag while taking care of 3 kids is crazy especially when one of the kids is jet lagged too. I can't tell you how good it felt to be home, sleeping in our own bed, having the comfort of being back in our own space again.
Landry is fitting right in great! We had a rough start with the sleep situation but seemed to have solved it. She absolutely does not want to be held when she is falling asleep, yet she doesn't want to be put down either. We have struggled with this for weeks now and it is exhausting to say the least. I just felt so bad for he because I had not idea what to do. As she has gotten more comfortable in our house she now prefers for us to just lay with her in the bed while she drinks her bottle. I will then pick her up and sway a bit until she dives into her bed. Sometimes it's immediate and sometimes its 10 minutes or so. Then we just stay in the room with her until she falls asleep. Seems to be working great and she is now sleeping 10+ hours at night and having a good 2+ hour nap during the day.
She still has nights where she wakes in terror and screams. I just ache for her at these moments because I know how scared she must be. For the past 19 months of her life she has been sleeping in the same place most likely with another child and now her life is completely different. At moments like this we usually scoop her up to console her and put her back to bed. Luckily she is sleeping in our room so the walk is not that far for this half sleeping mom.
I think it is safe to say that Landry is loving "American" food!
Hahahaha! For the first few days of us having her she would shovel anything in her mouth that we put in front of her. Well now, she has become a bit pickier! She will certainly spit something out and swat at you if you try to feed her more. This girl loves her some savory flavored food! She is still getting used to drinking and eating things that are cold. Her face is hysterical when it hits her lips! I would say her favorites right now are pasta, scrambled eggs, Pear/Pea/Broccoli puree pouch, biscuits, watermelon, grapes & chicken.
This girl has changed drastically since we first met her.
We we first met her, her caregivers were holding her head up. She could barely sit up and kept falling over. Her muscles were either very tense or very loose and she would throw her head back constantly. I think both Brett and I were a bit shocked by this as this was not the girl that we had seen in the video 4 months prior. You often hear of children in an orphanage giving up. I can't help but think if that is what was going on with her. Had she given up? Or was she just in complete shock for the transition that had just happened?
We are not sure and will really never know why but I can tell you, our girl has improved so much over the past 3 weeks She just amazes me:)
She is holding her head up so much better. She is crawling on all fours (unless she is trying to get somewhere in mock speed and then she reverts back to her crazy fast army crawl). She is standing on her own. She is walking assisted with hands and loves to scale around the room with furniture and toys.
She is even starting to attempt some super dare devil moves and climb onto things! Yikes!
We will work on getting her PT, OT & Speech Therapy later this week. She had her pediatrician appointment last week and it did not go well at all so I am holding off to give her a bit of a break this week. This girl is a fighter and will work herself into a sweat-drenched dry-heaving-mess of a scream-fest! I am excited to start therapy with her and can't wait to see how much more she will accomplish now that she is given the attention that she needs.
She is bonding well with her brothers. They are just the sweetest to her and dote on her every need. Brax has taken the big brother role seriously and loves to make sure she is ok and caters to her all the time. Wyatt certainly loves her and gives her kisses all the time! They have this game that they play where they get in her face and make crazy noises and she will then swat at them in the face. They think it is hysterical and she does too. I know that I will need to correct this behavior in the future but for now it is just so cute! (unless someone gets smacked with a wooden spoon)
So, as you can see, overall our past weeks have been great! But I wouldn't be completely honest with you to think that they were all perfect. I also don't want you to take my honesty as weakness for we are all weak and I just want to be transparent with you. As great as these moments have been, there have been equally hard moments. Our transition into our new family of five has has been hard at times. There have been times that I feel stretched too thin and a bit in over my head with this whole mom of 3 thing. There have been times where I know Braxton and Wyatt are aching for attention. There have been times where Brett and I have not been the best communicators There have been times where doubt begins to creep in.
And then the other night I thought-
The peaceful heart I receive from my obedience to Him
far exceeds any peace in my heart that I can create for myself.
That is what the lil voice in my head keeps on whispering in the hard moments.......
The moments where jet lag may start to get the best of me and I start thinking, I'm not sure I can do this. The moments where she is inconsolable and honestly, I don't know how to comfort her because we just met a few weeks ago. The moments where my boys are begging for me to play with them and I just can't because she needs so much more at this time. She deserves me. She deserves us. We can do this!
Of course this is hard. What we are doing is unimaginable to some. It was unimaginable to me for most of my life. But we are ALL called to do something......you just need to listen.
Don't ignore His voice when He speaks.
You might miss out on the greatest thing that could of been.
His plan is great.